Alexander

Alexander

To sum it up... if you want to feel like you've lost 6 hours of your life, go see this movie. It's not that it's a terrible movie, it's just extremely long. At one point, the narrator (Anthony Hopkins) says "Alexander should have died in India.... but that was a myth" and I let out a HUGE "siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh" and Rachel and I laughed... we laughed maniacally for our brains had been turned into goo because the movie was so long. It's the sign of a bad film when you constantly check your watch to try and figure out how much longer it could possibly go on for. By the end, Rachel said "Okay Anthony Hopkins, just SHUT UP SO WE CAN GO HOME" hahahahahaa.
All in all it wasn't bad plot-wise. Though I guess you can't really screw the plot up since it's basically a Hollywood-ized biography of Alexander. The little things got to me though... like: graphically showing men stabbing horses and elephants, thank you, but I really don't want to see animals being shot... Hephaestion at the battle in India - got sliced in the femoral artery with an axe and DIDN'T DIE. Sure, ok, whatever, except he would have bled to death you idiots. What REALLY pissed me off about it was that it slightly glorified genocide and assimilation. When Alexander tells the Persians that their sons will be Greek-educated and be part of the Greek army, they're all like "Wheeeeeee! I'm SO excited for that! Praise Alexander!". Sorry, I don't believe that

Pride and Prejudice

Pride and Prejudice

So I really seriously believed I would detest this movie, simply because I adore the 1995 miniseries, Colin Firth and I thought they had miscast pretty much everyone in this version. However, I left thinking it wasn't too bad and, upon further reflection, I realised it's pretty damn good (though obviously can't hold a candle to the BBC version).

The pros:

• Donald Sutherland as Mr. Bennet: I don't know how this man does it. He's 70 years old and he still kicks ass. He made Mr. Bennet a lot wittier rather than simply long-suffering.



• Brenda Blethyn as Mrs. Bennet: Brilliant. Absolutely fucking brilliant.



• The cinematography: They chose absolutely beautiful locations to film. Although I wasn't a fan of how slummed-down they made Longbourn, they kept Pemberley very much how I pictured it.



• Matthew MacFadyen: Yes, yes, he's no Colin Firth, that's for sure, but he still did a good job. I didn't think he was too handsome at first, but he really does grow on you, especially since he doesn't give up on Elizabeth even after she pretty much bitches him out for things he didn't do. There were certain moments between him and Elizabeth that I just loved too, such as when he gives her a hand up to her carriage after she stays at Netherfield with Jane, and when he walks away, he flexes his hand a bit. I don't know why I love that scene so much, I just do. It's very simple, but it conveys a lot. The scene where he goes to the Collins' house to see Elizabeth (and in my opinion, to propose) is great too, because it still retained the character's anxiety that Colin Firth did so well in the BBC version. I have to say, by the end, I thought Matthew MacFadyen was pretty hot, but that's probably due to the fact that I LOVE the character of Mr. Darcy, so it wouldn't matter who the hell played him as long as they did it relatively well. He also did an excellent job with the heated stares that Colin Firth did in the miniseries. No woman can resist a heated stare from Mr. Darcy (don't believe me? watch the miniseries/this movie)



• The Chemistry: Even though Ms. Keira disappointed me (see cons), I have to say that the two leads had some amazing chemistry. Even in the beginning, when she's supposed to hate him, you can still sense the underlying attraction between them.



• The fact that it's 2 hours long instead of 6: This is important. I have actually sat down and watched all 6 hours of the BBC miniseries in one day. It's definately still the best adaptation, but, with this film, you don't have to commit to all 6 hours in order to get the gist of the story. They had all of the important moments and it was still enjoyable. Granted, the passage of time wasn't as apparent as it is in the miniseries, but they do a pretty good job of trying to convey it in certain scenes.



• Not enough Wickham: Don't get me wrong, I hate his character, but there were too few scenes with him. You can't judge his character within the two main scenes that he's in. You don't even get the feeling that he "hates" Mr. Darcy as he's supposed to (though you definately feel the hatred from Mr. Darcy). Plus, he looked like Orlando Bloom's ugly cousin... and that's not a compliment.



• Improvement with Jane Bennet: No offense to Susannah Harker, but you are not, as Mrs. Bennet says, the beauty of the family. In the words of Alanna, she looks like a dinosaur. Jane is supposed to be the most beautiful of all the Bennet's daughters, but Elizabeth was definately the prettiest in the miniseries. I think they improved on that with this film. Rosamund Pike is noticeably prettier than Susannah Harker and, in my opinion, prettier than Keira Knightley, though that may be because I'm just sick of Keira Knightley's face plastered everywhere.
  

The cons:

• WHAT DID YOU DO TO MR. BINGLEY????????: *ahem* Seriously. What. Did. You. Do. Mr. Bingley is not a tongue-tied mentally deficient moron with exploded hair and bulging eyes. I can understand the stammering. He's so in love with Jane that he can't control his speech, etc etc. But really... give him so pomade for god's sake! He honestly comes across as someone who can't think for himself, and only FINALLY proposes to Jane because Darcy told him to.



• Keira Knightley: I'm sorry my dear, but frankly, you sucked. Okay, sucked is maybe too harsh a term, but you certainly didn't win me over. I don't know what it was... maybe it's just because I've gotten so used to seeing Jennifer Ehle as Elizabeth Bennet that I just can't possibly accept anyone else playing her. But I don't think that's it. I think it's because you sucked.



• The fact that she was in every scene: See above. If I thought she sucked, the fact that she's in almost every scene didn't do all that much to try and persuade me otherwise. They should have included the scene where Darcy goes and finds Wickham and Lydia and forces them to marry. Colin Firth did that bit SO well. Angry Mr. Darcy was so awesome.



• Costumes: Not a very big negative. They were still good, but just not as good as they were in the '95 version.



• The fact that it's only 2 hours: Yeah yeah, this was in the pros, so sue me. There are so many small scenes in the 1995 version that I've gotten attached to that weren't in this movie, and that really disappointed me. Such as the scene where Mr. Darcy gets all fussy about his clothing before he goes to meet with Elizabeth because he's planning to propose again (at least that's what I believe), or even the scene just after he proposes for the first time and both characters reflect on what they said to each other.



• Lydia Bennet: Lydia is supposed to be British... not fake American-British. Why they decided to use Jena Malone as Lydia Bennet is beyond me. They did a great job at getting newcomers for Mary and Kitty (Talulah Riley and Carey Mulligan), so why the hell did they use her??



• Charlotte Lucas: Speaking of miscasting. God. Charlotte may not be the pick of the batch, but my GOD.



• SAY SOMETHING OTHER THAN "well then": I don't know why this part bugs me as much as it does. One of the last scenes has Mr. Darcy basically re-professing his love for Elizabeth (absolutely beautifully shot). Anyone who's seen the miniseries or has read the book knows which scene I mean. Poor Mr. Darcy pours his heart out in a very romantic fashion, telling her that she's "bewitched him body and soul" and that he loves her... and all she can say is "well then". WELL THEN. Forgive me, but if I had someone as hot as Matthew MacFadyen tell he wanted to be with me forever: I think I'd say more than "well then".

One thing I'm not sure about is how I feel about how they portrayed Mr. Collins. He was a bit more likeable in this version, but he's more of a boob in the BBC version, which is more fun. He's also more smarmy in the '95 version.
So overall, I think it's worth going to see. I'll probably end up going to see it again, and will most likely buy it when it comes out on DVD. And if you don't go see it, Mr. Darcy will frown at you:

Serenity

Serenity

I was finally able to finagle a couple of people to go see this with me over Thanksgiving. I went to see it without having seen any episodes of "Firefly", but I still really enjoyed it. Apparently Orson Scott Card, the author of the Ender's Game book series, said that this was the best science fiction movie ever made. I'm not sure I'd go that far, since I'm a huge fan of the Star Wars films, but Serenity comes pretty damn close. It's got everything: action, comedy, drama, romance, AND cannibals! Now who would pass that up? It's apparently coming out on DVD and video (does anything come out on VHS anymore?) sometime in December, and I would recommend people to see it... but watch "Firefly" first. You get the background of the characters and it makes the movie that much more understandable.
Iis a GREAT movie. It made me like Jayne, Simon and River all that much more. It's a great "season finale" to the series that, in my opinion, shouldn't have been cancelled in the first place.

Domino

Domino

Another great movie. Tony Scott did a great job in creating a film that is both visually stimulating and just generally entertaining. Although I'm sure I'll be bitching about her job in the upcoming P&P adaptation, Keira Knightley is excellent in this. It was refreshing to see her play a tough bitch for once. Mickey Rourke is great as her boss and Edgar Ramirez is also perfect as Choco, who's described as "psychotic" more than once. Again, this is one of those movies that touches every genre: it's very stylized, very funny, dramatic, action-packed and very sad. I would recommend seeing it on the big screen if you are planning to go see it, which you really should. I didn't think I was going to like it all that much when I saw the previews, simply because I'm not a huge fan of Keira Knightley... but I'm still recovering from just how good it was.